Field Report and questions from a beginner

[crhothem]

Hey,
So I went to the whiskey bar for a semi-friend's bday tonight. The party ended up being pushed back one hour so I was there alone. I sat at the bar with a ginger ale trying to keep my Frame strong and not getting awkward and shitty body language. As I'm sitting there I start talking with this massive guy next to me with 3 girls; a 8 and two 6's. When I ask my goto group opener, "So, how do y'all know each other?" He explains he used to date the 8 and it's clear he still likes her. Good thing to keep in mind, I find a guy usually only hangs out with a ex if she dumped him. If he dumps her, there's a reason, and between the two, women will keep men friends, while men really don't keep women around unless they're working on getting into their pants. Let me know if I'm wrong about this guys. So I start talking to the cuter of the 6's. Maybe a 6.3. She's okay, can totally see where she's probably a little bitchy but I figure it's good practice talking to girls. She's short, healthier than I prefer, and brunette which I like. I keep her talking about she eventually tells me about a Inter-mural sports team they do and that I should be on their kickball team this season. So I go in for the number close, "Hey, I have to get back to my friends but give me your number and then I'll call you and we can sign up for kick ball." I get the number. Again this was no really hot girl but this week i've opened and closed 3 numbers with 3 girls. I'm pretty happy about that. I'm building confidence and getting comfortable going from opening, to building rapport to closing for the number. I'm also getting better at noticing nuances in talking to girls and keeping my energy high in conversations. That's big that I wasn't doing before. Girls don't want to carry the body language of a conversation so i'm boosting my energy level making my body match my words in involvement in the conversation. Oh and side note the girl texted me after I left the bar that a country song came on after I left and had mentioned i like country in our conversation. Hopefully that means she was listening and my presence stayed in her mind after I left.
Any one have advice on a few things I've been running into? Of course thinking back I can see a couple of places where I could have been stronger in the conversation. When I asked her what she thought of the dating scene here she rolls her eyes and looks a little frustrated and goes on to tell me she only meets "bad boys" and "assholes". Is this a challenge or is there a best way to respond to something like that. In retrospect I probably should have moved the conversation past that or asked her what she's attracted to. But I think I got nervous and changed topics. Ideas?
Another thing I've come up against. After I get a number under the premise of doing a activity later in the week. When I go to set up that activity I can't lock down a date with the girl. Texts will be fun and flirty through the week but then come date day they don't answer and then say they "lost their phone" or something. Ideas?
Thanks guys!

[ablosser]

hey man,
first, for that "bad boy/asshole" comment, I would've gone along w/ it and responded in a slightly cocky, but definitely joking and playful way saying something like, "well you defffinitely won't like me cause i'm a huge bad boy." then make it way over the top so she knows ur just playing like, "ya, i've got tats all over my arms and i drive harleys w/out a helmet, but i guess we can't hang out though, because you don't like us 'bad boys'"
so first took wat she said, and instead of saying, "ooo ya, i hate bad boys, im such a nice guy" you kind of make fun of her in a fun way, and then if she doesn't know if ur serious or not, u take it over the top w/ the other comments and lastly you kind of tease her that you two can't be friends b/c of her attitude... it's kind of a push/pull technique and works really well if you have a smell/grin on your face while your doing it and if you put your hand on their should and look them in the eyes while you say "it looks like we can't be friends since i'm such a bad boy"... works great, b/c then they'll be like no, wait i was joking, i love bad boys, let's be friends... or w/e

and for the setting up dates things on txts, you have to be the leader. lead them; give them a plan and tell them, "hey, so this is what we're gonna do, blah blah blah, it's gonna be awesome (u don't have to add that last part)... but ya if you're assertive while setting up the plan and flirty/fun all the other times it should be good

hope that shit helps

cheers,
Drew

[crhothem]

Great idea Drew. I'm going totally going to use that next time i come up against that. Then maybe future pace (Nick Sparks), ie: "Guess we can't be friend then huh? Like I know we'd start dating and be really hot and heavy for 3 weeks with great sex and then I'd break your heart and you'd stalk me and then our friends would have to pick sides and it'd be this whole big thing. So I guess now we're basically ex's who call each other for a booty call when we're drunk at 2 in the morning. But at least we'll always have Paris, right?" I like your slightly cocky Drew, and then future pacing in terms of a relationship. I'm still absorbing a lot of the material out there but is this something that you guys think would work?