Text Messaging Tips
January 30, 2010
Sadly, I don’t usually get a chance to respond to all the questions we get sent… we’re working to make our video blogs a once a day thing, and in the meantime, we all appreciate your patience when you send a question in and don’t hear from us right away. But every now and then someone writes in, and I’m sitting right by the email and I’m able to get back with a quick response :) So please enjoy this very brief text messaging breakdown I shared with “D”. My annotations are in italics.
> Sunday, Jan. 17 4:25 pm
> D:
> “Hi there…my sister gave me your #. We should meet for coffee
> tomorrow at some point if you’re free.
>
Coulda introduced yourself better. “hey, this is your future best
friend named D! my sis gave my ur number and said we’d get along
:)”
then you went straight for asking her out instead of building rapport.
she smelled your agenda a mile away.
> Sun, Jan 17 6:04 pm
> M:
> Hey, it’s nice to hear from you, coffee sounds good, but im going to
> the suburbs to see my dad, he just got home from the hospital but i
> might be back in the evening or else another night this week?
>
> Sun, Jan. 17, 6:58 pm
> D:
> In that event, why don’t we get together later in the week? How’s
> Friday look for you? I’m also down there on Thursdays.
>
don’t ask girls out on friday for the first time, weekends are for
friends and boyfriends weeknights are for dates. also the way you ask
a girl out is to say “when are you available next week?” so that
you’re not just throwing out possible dates.
> Sun, Jan. 17, 8:40 pm
> M:
> Friday is my birthday actually :) but thursday could work
>
> Sun, Jan 17, 9:25 pm
> D:
> Alright, Thursday it is then. Now we just have to figure out where and when.
>
no vibing off her birthday, you’re just straight to the point of
asking her out. she’s giving you so much to play with and you just
keep pressing towards asking her out. this exchange isn’t fun for her
or making her smile, it’s just some guy asking her out with logistics.
> Monday, Jan 18, 10:36 am
> Sorry for delayed response, thursday sounds good!
>
> Monday, Jan 18, 11:04 am
> D:
> No worries. How about Iguana Cafe at 6 PM? We can meet there or I can
> pick you up?
>
way to soon to respond after she took 12 hours to respond.
> M:
> Sounds good! i can just meet you there since you have to be somewhere
> after, thats probably easiest
>
> D:
> Cool, I will see you there on Thurs. :)
>
you should have been texting with her between then an thurs. but
since your whole exchange up to this point was only about asking her
out and not about having fun and building intrigue and rapport, you
didn’t have anything to say.
> * * *
> Thursday, Jan 21 3:40 pm.
> Hey, im at the doctor, i left work early with a horrible sore throat,
> they are testing me for strep :( so tonite probably wont work, i dont
> wanna give u germs plus i feel miserable, i feel bad but hopefully we
> can reschedule!
>
> Thurs., Jan 21, 4:15 pm
> D:
> Well, I would take my chances ;)…but it’s probably best that you
> rest and get healthy again. We can get together once you’re feeling
> better
>
indicating way too much interest in the first sentence.
> M:
> Strep test was positive, trust me u dont want this! at least i got an
> antibiotic, what a fun birthday im gonna have :( lets try next week?
>
> D:
> That really sux. Nobody should be sick on their birtday. Yeah, let’s
> do it next week. I’ll check back w/you in a few to figure out details.
> Feel better, gorgeous
>
don’t call her gorgeous, that’s lame. also you could have been cuter
like “awww booooo illness is lame, yeah no worries we’ll figure out
something else” but again by this point you shoulda had a lot more
rapport
> * * *
> Jan 22, 12:08 pm
> D:
> I’m known for calling my friends on their birthdays and doing my best
> Elvis impression, but you’re already ill and I wouldn’t want to make
> your condition worse
>
> Jan 22, 2:03 pm
> M:
> Haha, thats funny, im in bed all drugged up on nyquil, thanks for the thought!
>
> Jan 22, 2:16 pm
> (***I suspect I fucked up somewhere in the following exchange***)
> D: My jokes tend to be funnier if the other person is on some
> mind-altering substance or another
>
you messed up way before this… sorry chief!
> Next message, sent at 2:20 pm
> Anyway…hopefully there’s something there to make the day a little
> less miserable…like a Golden Girls marathon on tv or something along
> those lines
>
> On Monday, January 25, I sent her the following text message:
> Hey, how are you feeling? Do you wanna try again this Thursday?
don’t go straight to asking her for a date. lame and goal oriented. re-establish rapport and make her laugh and smile instead
We are coming out with a program on Text Messaging VERY soon – it’s in “testing” right now and feedback has been awesome so far :) Hope you enjoyed this – now go make some girls smile!
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Today’s question comes from Erik on Facebook. He was working toward getting back together with an ex, when all of a sudden a wrench got thrown into his plans and asks what to do:
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